PHILLIPS, Mackenzie Grace

[mackenziephillips]

MACKENZIE GRACE PHILLIPS

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I CAN’T HIDE THE MONSTER ANYMORE
ONE CAN, ONLY FEEL DESOLATE FOR SO LONG

FULL NAME: Mackenzie Grace Phillips
NICKNAMES: Mac
AGE: 18
SEXUALITY: heterosexual
MEMBER GROUP: student
OCCUPATION: Freshman

ONE STARTS TO CHANGE INTO
SOMETHING THE MIRROR DOESN’T RECOGNIZE

HAIR: Mac's hair is short, she recently cut it and now it rests just upon her shoulders. Her hair is a very dark brown, sometimes it looks like it's black. It's pretty much a mess and she doesn't really care about it anyway, she likes her messy hair.
EYES: blue/green
HEIGHT: 5' 6"
SCARS: Three, all from her car accident. Two larges ones, one that runs from the bottom of her shoulderblade down to her side and around her stomach. Another is on her right leg, goes from the middle of her thigh down to her knee. The third one is small, just above her eyebrow, no one really notices it.
TATTOOS: None
PIERCINGS: She has her left ear pierced once.
PLAY BY: Kristen Stewart

THE DARKNESS HAS BEEN BIDING ITS TIME
TO CLAIM ITS LATEST VICTIM, FRESH MEAT FOR CARNAL DESIRES

LIKES: • Jeans • Funny Phrases Tees • Her brother • Philosophy • Literature • Jewelery • Ed Hardy • Swearing • Military jackets • Teachers • Studying • Writing • French • Sunsets • Climbing trees • Converse • Sneakers • Thrillers • Action movies • Popcorn

DISLIKES: • Skirts • Dresses • Belts • Pink • Crying • Going out • Dancing • Being in the spotlight • Romantic movies • Vegetables • Her mother

FEARS: • Fast Driving
• Losing Franklin
• Losing someone she loves
• Needing someone
• Turning into her mother

SECRETS:
- Got pregnant at 16, but lost the baby when she was injured due to a car accident
- Can't have children, has a 15% chance of ever carrying a child through the first trimester.
- Sometimes wishes that she could be a mother someday

PERSONALITY:

Creative, she has a hard time expressing herself and that’s why she always turns to writing to let out what she’s feeling. But it’s not just writing. Mac also loves to draw, anything and anyone. It her way of expression herself because she hates to share what she’s thinking and feeling in any other way. It’s just her way and no one would ever understand what she’s writing or drawing. Which makes it easier for her to write it down anyway.

Stubborn, Mac is one of the most stubborn people that you will ever know. She doesn’t like to do something because someone tells her to do so. She’s a very stubborn girl and she will never let anyone tell her what to do.

Smart, in class she's quiet but her grades are always above average. And they're supposed to be because Mac wants to be a doctor after college.

Headstrong, once Mac makes up her mind she is very difficult to be told otherwise. Once she forms her opinion she sticks with it even when it’s obvious that she is in fact wrong.

Sarcastic, sarcasm is Mac’s best friend. She loves it because it’s such an easy way to insult people and mostly they don’t even know that they are being insulted. Nearly every comment that Mac makes is sarcastic.

Closed off, it’s very difficult for make to share her feelings with anyone. She is very closed off from the world and she likes to keep her problems and her issues to herself. She’s not really interested in other people’s problems either. She is a very private person and she doesn’t like to share with others. She writes her feelings down and she doesn’t talk about them. Whenever she hears a rumor about someone or about herself she ignores it. She just doesn’t care about those things.

Writer, Mac’s journal is top secret, even from her brother Franklin. She carries it with her everywhere she goes and no one really knows what she writes in there. However, she knows that if anyone ever stole her journal and read it, that they would find something on every single person in the entire school. She loves to observe and everything she sees she writes in her journal. Once she writes something down it’s out of her mind, it’s her way of calming her constantly crowded mind.

Rebellious, maybe she’s not really a big rebel. But she is stuck in this teenage phase where she goes against everything that someone tells her. Especially when it comes to her mother. Everything her mother says she will hate and she will go against it. If there is one thing that she never wants to become it’s her mother and that’s why she is so eager to go against her. They are complete opposites, or so it would seem.

Curious, Mac is a very curious person, not so much when it comes to people and their gossip about who is doing who and where. But more about why they people are there, where they’re headed, what they are really like behind the mask that she believes everyone wears.

Independent, Mac believes that she is complete within herself, that she doesn’t need anyone to take care of her and that she is just perfectly fine on her own. And she is. There is nothing that she can’t do alone, because she just doesn’t feel the need to be with someone. Where other girls are screaming that they will die alone when they’re single at 16, Mac knows that if love wants to find her it will, and if it doesn’t, well then that’s fine too. She doesn’t like to rely on people and she doesn’t like to ask for help. She wants to be able to do everything herself. Some people might think of her as a b!tch because she feels this way, and when people offer to help her she always reclines because she wants to do it herself.

TO BECOME WHAT I BECOME
I VIEWED THE SUN FOR THE VERY LAST TIME

MOTHER: Grace Phillips, 39, librarian
FATHER: Christopher Phillips, 42, owns 2 scoops café
SIBLINGS: Franklin, 18, twin brother, freshman in college
OTHER IMPORTANT PEOPLE: Her grandparents, Lily Evangile de Pompignac and Eugene de Pompignac and her Uncle Max
ORIGIN: New Orleans
HISTORY:

The early nineties, two people from different places in the world, different places in rank, different places in their life, met and fell in love.
Grace Corner, a prom queen, coming from a perfect and fairly rich white family. She grew up on the the better side of the city, knowing all the good fortune that life could bring.
And then there was Christopher, a high school drop-out, coming from a poor and dysfunctional black family. He grew up on the bad side knowing poverty like no other.
But when these two people met, they didn’t care about their differences, they were in love and that was all that mattered. They married and though at first it didn’t seem like it would happen, Grace her family accepted the poor black boy into their family. The rest of their neighbourhood thought it was weird and they weren’t accepted, Grace suffered a great deal of this, but she couldn’t leave the love of her life. Before she knew it, she was pregnant.

January 5th, in the middle of a cold and stormy winter the young newlywed couple, Grace and Christopher Phillips, were in their car on their way to the hospital as Grace had just gone into labour. But due to the great amounts of snow that had been falling for days, the couple couldn't get to the hospital in time. There was no other way, the twins that she was carrying were not going to wait another minute to get out and get their breath or pure air. She was quickly moved to the backseat and Christopher tried his best to what ever he could for his wife. Within minutes the twins were born and the ambulance came quickly to take the newborn babies to the hospital. They were perfectly healthy and nothing seemed to be wrong with them, however there was something very odd about them. The girl, named Mackenzie Grace, was a perfect pale white skinned happy little baby. And the boy, named Franklin Christopher, was however, a perfect dark skinned happy little baby. This event of a black and a white was rare, and both parents were shocked. They knew that this wasn’t going to be easy for them, or for the children, but they thought it would all turn out alright.

Mackenzie and Franklin grew up as two perfect little happy children, though Mackenzie started to have trouble with her mother from about the time that she was five. Her mother was so thrilled to have a little girl, wanting to change her into a little copy of herself, wanting her to wear pretty dresses and lots of pink. Mackenzie, nicknamed Mac, however, had different ideas for how she was going to dress and act. Whenever her mother put her in something that even slightly looked like a dress, she would go outside and roll in the mud, or just go upstairs and wear something of her brother’s. This was stressing her mother out more than anything, and she was determined to turn Mac into a pretty little girl and she wasn’t going to stop no matter how much Mac objected to it. One day Grace took her little girl to get her ear pierced, hoping that it would somehow help her to realise that she was indeed a girl and not a tomboy. Of course, this didn’t work out the way Grace had planned, they pierced one ear and then Mac ran out before they could do her other ear. After this Mac became even closer to her father than she already was. Which was difficult for her because her father was black and she was white, making it every difficult for people to understand that they are father and daughter.

Everything seemed to be absolutely perfect in this little family, not counting the mother’s frustration with Mac. However, when Mackenzie and Franklin were eight, Franklin started going down hill. He was tired all the time and hardly went to school, Mac was so worried about her little brother and no one really knew what was going on. She was only eight at the time so she really didn’t understand what could be wrong, but she just knew that something was very wrong with her brother and it was bigger than everyone thought. You hear about this bond between twins a lot and with Franklin and Mac that was definitely the case, they could always sense things about each other. When finally the doctors found out what was wrong with Franklin, Mac didn’t know what to do, she didn’t understand what was wrong with him. The doctors found out that he had cancer, leukaemia. Of course, neither of them really knew what this was, they just knew that Franklin was sick and that he had to get better.

Years went by and Franklin had his up and downs during his illness. Mac was there for him every step of the way, always holding hands while he was getting chemo and sometimes when the nurses would let she would spend the night with him in the hospital when took a bad turn. So many times she was sure that she was going to lose him, it felt all wrong to see him like that, but every time he survived and got better. Finally, when they were thirteen, the doctors said that he was officially cured. It was the happiest moment in Mac’s life, her brother wasn’t going to die and he was just going to stay with her.
And though this was the happiest day of Mac’s life, from that moment on, the twins started to grow apart. They were both slowly turning into teenagers and even though they were still close and they still hung out together, it was getting less by the day.

Mac’s mother was determined to turn her into a girl, one way or another. Of course, Mac didn’t agree and fought her mother in every way possible. Every time the woman came home with something that even looked like a dress, pink or anything girly Mac would just walk out the door and roam the city for a few hours. But her mother never gave. She organised parties for her and her so-called friends, during that time Mac just stayed in her room and sit in a corner somewhere not interested in anything her mother had to say or what she did. During this time she kind off lost track of what was going on in Franklin’s life and she missed her brother so much. But when she was fourteen her missing her brother was suddenly overpowered by something else. Her new English teacher, Mr Angles. The second she laid eyes on him she was lost, she had no idea what came over her but suddenly she felt dizzy and sick to her stomach but she enjoyed the feeling more than anything she had ever felt.

He was the one that inspired her to write, after having to write a poem for English he seemed stunned by the talent that this little fourteen year old girl seemed to have in her. He began to develop a fascination with her and with her writing, this of course made Mac’s crush only bigger. Every time he told her that something she wrote was good, she would blush and start to ramble something incoherently, Mr Angles would laugh and his laugh would only make it worse as she realised that his musical laugh was the most amazing she had ever heard. Every day she just fell more in love with him and her mother noticed the subtle changes in her. Suddenly, Mac started to care what she looked like, wearing more girly things once even using some of her mother’s make up. Grace felt like she had finally accomplished her goal and felt confident that Mac was finally turning into the daughter that she had always wanted her to be.

Mr Angles was so convinced of Mac’s writing that he signed her up for a local writing contest, knowing that she would be able to win it. Mac wrote the most beautiful poem she had ever written, at least according to herself. Of course it was about her big, first love and when Mr Angles read it he smiled so dazzling that she was convinced that he knew that she loved him and that he loved her just as much. The night of the contest Mac wore a dress. Frank was shocked at this, so was her mother and her dad was the most shocked of all. He had a strange feeling he knew was little Mac was suddenly being something that she wasn’t. When they arrived at the school where the contest was held Mac ran through the halls trying to find Mr Angles, because she knew that he would make her feel confident and strong just like he always did.

However, when she found him, she could really feel her heart sinking into her stomach, breaking as soon as it hit. It felt like someone had just punched her in the stomach and she just wanted to crawl into a little corner and cry. When she found Mr Angles, he was making out with another woman, his girlfriend she later found out, fiancée actually. Mac was stunned, and when Mr. Angles noticed her and walked towards her with that smile playing around his perfect lips she just shook her head and ran the other way. Running out of the school and onto the parking lot. Her father followed her, this was just what he had expected and he told her that everything was going to be alright. Mac just said that she wanted to get the hell out of that dress. Her dad laughed “Now there’s the Mac I know” he said with a bright smile.

She got over Mr Angles, suddenly noticing his flaws and realising that it was ridiculous of her to change for a guy she had a crush on. She went back to being Mac, the strong, independent, jeans wearing Mac. Though she was grateful for Mr Angles, he brought out the writer in her and she never gave that up, not even when she got a new English teacher.

Mac did fall in love again, with her brother’s best friend, Matthew. But her mother didn’t agree with this relationship and eventually told them that they couldn’t see each other anymore. They decided to run away together.
However, once again their moment of happiness didn't last long. As they left New York, the car was hit by a drunk driver, all Mac could remember was the car being thrown off the road and then she blacked out. She woke up what could have been hours later, upside down in the car. Moving caused her great pain and she called out for Matthew but he didn't respond, she glanced to her side and he wasn't there. With great trouble and pain, she managed to crawl out of the car, only to find him there a few feet away from the car, in the grass. Mac crawled over to him as fast as she could, not realising that moving was only making her own injuries even worse. Matthew was still breathing when she reached him, and he smiled softly when he saw her. Mac just kept talking to him, lay down next to him and held him just like she used to do when Franklin was very sick.

She sang to him softly, the songs that they had written together, she didn't notice how he was slowly slipping away. She must have blacked out again because the next thing she knew she woke up in a hospital room, Franklin next to her humming to her like he used to when she was little. She had no idea what was going on, all she knew was that everything was hurting that that even breathing was difficult.

WILL YOU STILL HOLD ME
WHEN YOU SEE WHAT I HAVE DONE

ALIAS: JB
AGE: 19
EXPERIENCE: 2.5 years or something
SAMPLE:

It had always been so easy for her to just shut out everything that was happening around her, she could just pull her face into an expression of indifference and that was how she would feel as well. Mac was so good at shutting out the entire world and herself, she was able to shut out everything that she was feeling and she could just turn numb, completely and utterly numb and nothing would effect her anymore. It was the one thing that she could always trust, the one thing that she could always cling to and the one thing that she could fall back on when things took a turn for the worst in her life. People always thought that she was insensitive because she hadn't even cried at Matthew's funeral, she never cried once when Franklin was sick and not once did she show any kind of emotion when his heart stopped beating again. She could always just go numb. But no matter how much she tried she couldn't turn her feelings off this time. Her body ached in a way that she didn't even recognize. It was like something kept puncing her in her stomach over and over again and it made her want to curl up even more than she already was. She didn't understand it and that just made it worse. This wasn't the kind of pain that Mac was used to, the kind of pain that she could handle. She would give everything to just be able to jam something in her leg or in her eye so that she had something else to focus on, something concrete that she could hold onto instead of this strange pain that she couldn't place.

Mac had been through a lot of physical pain in the last year and she never realized just how much she relayed on that pain to distract her from everything else. She wanted that pain back so that she could ignore this pain she was feeling now. But what she was feeling now was what she was supposed to feel. For once she couldn't hide from her feelings and it was catching up with her fast. The wall that she was leaning against was the only thing that kept her from falling to the ground and curling up into a ball. It was strange how the thing that was causing her all this was all that she wanted. She wanted him there even though she had run away from him not too long before. On the other hand having him there would mean that he would see her like this and that she didn't want. She didn't want anyone to know that she might actually have any kind of genuine feelings.

Her eyes fluttered closed without her wanting them too, suddenly feeling more tired than she had ever felt before. Even though she was in the one place where she had always felt safe she didn't feel that way at all. What was she supposed to do now? Eventually someone would find her and they would force her to leave. She couldn't stay there forever even if she wanted to. And what would happen to Kenneth if she actually did leave him alone from now on? She knew what he was like when he was stressed out or frustrated, he wouldn't make it till the end of the week. Mac squeezed her eyes shut tighter and rested her head against the wall, for once in her life not even caring about the fact that there were tears running down her face. It felt weird to be crying but she didn’t know what to do anymore, she felt completely useless and lost and she didn't know how to fix it. She had no control over what she was feeling or what she was doing anymore, her body was shuddering and shivering and she couldn't make herself stop. And that was freaking her out.

Even though she was lost in her own fucked up mind she still heard someone walking into the apartment and judging from the sound of the footsteps she already knew who it was. She wanted to get up and move away when she felt him sitting down next to her but she couldn't make herself move. She was still there, her entire body leaning sideways against the wall, her eyes closed and her arms wrapped tightly around her legs. This was not how she ever wanted him to see her, or how she ever wanted anyone to see her for that matter because she hated being this weak and vulnerable. She wished that she could just sit up straight, brush her hair and tears from her face and go back to the numb state that she had always been in. But it didn't work, she was too broken down to even try and convince herself that she was already.

When he touched her hair she flinched away from him, turning her face more towards the wall and wrapping her arms tighter around her legs, curling more into a ball than she already was. "Go away," she murmured, her voice not even the slightest bit convincing. It sounded so weak that Mac hated the sound of her own voice. But for once she couldn't hide what she was feeling from her face or voice and all she really wanted was for him to be there and hold her. But she couldn't let that happen so she tried to get up again, trying to move away from him. For some reason her body started to listen to her again and she struggled to get to her feet, using the wall to stand up straight and taking a few steps away from him. She ran her hands over her face and back through her hair, turning her back towards Kenneth to make sure that he couldn't see her face. It was difficult to ignore the pain in her gut and she wrapped her arms around her stomach to try and make it go away.

tagged; kenneth
wearing; this

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this app was made be dee. steal and a band of angry-ass vampire-robot-nazi’s will find you and go elizabeth bathory on your ass.

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[DEEDERS]